30 August 2013,

This blog had been abandoned for few months. Well, since I am here, I do not mind to tell what had happens to me this few month.

Well, after Mechanics mid term exam, I withdrew myself from my University due to over stress and pressure. It was mainly because I have negative mindset. So, once I have done the midterm test that day, I feel depress, sad and hopeless. It is not because my family member do not support me, I feel depress because I feel useless because my dad waste lots of money sending me to University and all he want was wanted me to study hard. Even this also I cannot give him. (But I did not told dad that I want to withdraw at all, I just remain silent until the day I go back home)

Things happen when my dad come into my room and ask me how was my study progress. Suddenly, my tears had came out and I cant control myself from crying. Although physically boys may look tough and strong, but once boys had exceed his hold limit, they will burst like girls did. It is not because he is not strong, but simply he had been strong for too long. Well, that night dad had offer me to have a rest first and take some time to think what do I want actually. 

So during my rest time, I had work with my dad. I admit that it was fun during the starting time. Not until the day when I was surfing the internet and make me saw all my classmate were doing experiment in the Lab. That time I start to think. why am I here sitting in front of computer doing nothing and that is also the day I start to regret for being too impulse to withdrew myself from University. 

I have take some of my time to write down what is the life that I want after that. Guess what, although Engineering is tough but it still on my list. During the time when I was writing, I had found out my biggest problem on why I feel stress during my study time and the reason is, I spend too much of my time by doing report writing which cause me to have less time to study for exam. And also, my attitude is not good during my study time, I always proud of myself and when people give suggestion for me, I will always think that my idea is the best and never listen to them. When I face difficulties in homework or assignment, I never seek help from people. I have to change this kind of attitude.

My father and mother whom used to be my supporter, but now when I mention I want to go back to study life, "you better be serious and do not waste your dad a single cent again ". Well, they had lost their trust and confidence on me. Luckily, I still have friends to support me. With their encouragement, motivation and advice, I decide to give myself a chance to work hard again. 

Hey mum and dad ! Please watch out from now. Although the day have not reach for now, but one day, you both will be proud of me. Give your Son another 5 years time from now and he will be no longer an ordinary boy but a Civil Engineer ! :D 

9 April 2013,

Called dad and my room was flood of tears. I cried is not because of I failed my mechanics midterm but is because of disappoint my parents. I feel useless and then I cried. Some faxes about me is if I really work hard enough on something but still do not get the desired outcome then for sure I will cry. Cry alone of coz. Well, I hope I will be better after this .

Crying isn't meant one are weak but it simply means the one had been strong for too long.

9 April 2013,

Although I wish to cry out loud now but I keep telling myself crying/sad are useless now. One week of holidays and I spend almost 4-5days to prepare my mechanics midterm but still I can't do the midterm questions. My tears keep coming out while sitting friend's car back to hostel. It is not because the midterm hard but is my own problem. Even simple question I can get wrong. Most of my friend are so happy that they can solve the questions. I study so much of a part but it totally didn't ask about it. Well, I can say that I focus wrong things. The things I didn't focus it came out. Just now when I had dinner with my cousin, I remain silent I think lots of things. I even think off to withdraw myself from my current school and stop my studies to avoid wastage of my parents money. Then I though for a while, why did our creator create negative emotion ? Why? Negative emotion are there to give us signal/message. So after the midterm test I get negative emotion, which tells me that I have to get well prepared for the final examination. Ok, now I've get the signal. I must study harder than before to pass my mechanics exam with flying colors. If I really that unfortunate fail mechanics in final exam. I'm always ready to retake! I believe "hard work pay off" this proverb. If you had work hard and still haven't get your reward, meaning to say that you are close to success. You work even harder then before then success will be your's soon.

No pain no gain.

16 Jan 2012 (12am),

It is in late the midnight which I had woke up from sleep. " Is it really hard to score 4 flat ? " I asked myself. I think it could be hard if I dream it without taking any action but it could be other way round if I take action with the goal I set right ? I was once a kind of person who will give up easily when I saw there is no instant outcome. Seriously, I cant accept the outcome I get if I had put effort and did the best I can for something but GOD gave me chances to perform. He did not gave me desire outcome which I want. There was one time I wonder to myself, what if I really work hard enough, did the best I can, take action until the end but still do not get the desire result ? This is one of the issue which give me headache those days. Of course many people will say "just take action until you get the result", but it is not as easy as you think. To reset a goal , we must have faith, confidence, courage,  encouragement and a willing heart. Without them, you couldn't achieve anything in life. The way I overcome the problem were accept the truth by sharing the problem i faced with my family and friends, change my learning strategy and take action until I get the result. And now, I really get my desire result this time ! So my next target will be 4 flat. ;) I had prove that success is not about achieve the target or goal that you have set but rather success is the continuously process moving towards your goal as each and everyday.


成功只留给做好充足准备的人
Wong, Ananda asserted "Success is for people who made sufficient preparation".

14 December  2012,

      My result had finally release. Well, it is not that I want to show off but share my achievement to each of you.This had prove that my hard work pay off. The exam was not easy but indeed hard and tough. From here , I can tell you that mindset is very important. Let me give you a good example, there are times when you set goal and you do your best to achieve them and suffer a failure instead. You aim for an A in the exam but scored a C. You must motivate yourself by saying 'I do not get the desire result, it is not a failure whereas it is a learning experience. By going through the set back, I now know what strategy of learning doesn't work. In my mind, they are no way I could fail. By setting goal and taking action, I got only succeed or to learn something'.     

     

      Thomas Edison tested more than 5000 light bulbs. To him, this unsuccessful experiment didn't consider as failure but a learning experience. Instead, he had discovered more than 5000 ways of light bulb didn't work. In winners mind, failure only happen when they quit or if there not even make an attempt. As long as you give your best and refuse to quit , it is impossible to fail.

       By the way, I have successfully get the letter of commendation from school for two semester straight. I will  work even harder from now to achieve more in my life. =)

      

       Semester 1 and semester 2 .

Ray Ling asserted that 'as long you take action with target you set, the chances for you to success will be higher'. 

26 October 2012,

I cried while taking with dad on the phone just now due to stress. I am so worry that I will fail in the coming exam. It is not because I didn't study , but it is because i forget what had been tough. Wasted lots of my parent note to send me to private college. I have no time to cry now. What can I really do now is do the best to study and scored a good result in the coming exam. What can I say now is being an engineer is not easy as you think. They experience more failure compare to other field career during the graduate process.


The process are hard and challenging but the fruits are big and sweet .

18 October 2012,

I cried over spilled milk once again. I consulted my math tutorial lecture and still make mistake along the way. Sorry to say that I disappointed you again Mr.Beejay as well to my parent. Wasted lots of my parent's note for sending me to collage and now get the bad result. Even an easy stuff also can make mistake. I guess sleep until the next day will be the best effective medicine for now. I'm so down. :(

Questions on my mind now ..

1. Why does mistake always seek for human ?
2. Why human work so hard and still make mistake ?
3. Why do human like to think so much?
4. Why human always cry over a spilled milk ?

Whyyyyyyyyy???????!!!!!


Fall down seven , get down eight~